Darkened Soul
JA (aka Raven772)

The shades pulled down slowly,
so that I can remember what
sunlight once looked like.
Heartless light!

There is darkness that
washes over me completely.
One that I have longed for.
My life's journey.

First my eyes are blinded.
My vision shut off against the pain.
Pictures of it flash before my eyes.
Too much heartache.

My mind draws a blank, numbing me.
A dullness that I have searched for.
The images of yesterday gone.
The harsh memories erased.

I hear the sounds of darkness.
It is as cold and uncaring as I have become.
I welcome it openly.
No more screams and tears.

Shadowed darkness moves across my limbs.
It is an easy feeling.
I give myself up to it.
It calms and comforts me.

My heart blackens and chills.
No more ache to settle here.
No more broken pieces to gather.
No suffering to burden it with.

In my darkness, I sit and wait.
Wait for the lulling sleep of blackness.
A dreamless sleep that heals.
The last sleep.

Cruel light shall never touch me again.
Perhaps it never has touched my soul.
Never shined brightly within me.
That is closer to the truth.

Do not pity me, for this is my serenity.
Alone within the darkness I find solitude.
It only asks that I remain empty and unfeeling.
Shut out the rest of the world.

I find happiness here.
Happy that I can pull down the shades.
Happy that I can shut out life.
Happy to release myself to the nothingness I have become.

In this cold darkness, I find comfort.
Peace, understanding, and acceptance.
Solitude is a more acceptable fate to me.
More then the fates of being broken by those I have loved.

Darkness, my eternal lover.
My friend in black.
Twin to my own heart.
So much alike, that we are one in the same.

I am darkness and it is I.
Forever married and bound by blackened ties.
Eternally one, never to be separated.
Sealed by the cold kiss of death once more.

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